Did you remember to take out the garbage?

Seriously. It’s overflowing and your kitchen is starting to smell.  And don’t think you can just leave it in the garage. Because the flies happen first and then it starts to stink up the place, like Sardinian sheep cheese. How many times have I told you to PLEASE take out the garbage?  It’s ridiculous. And if you leave it on the floor overnight inside, your dog will get to it, and rip out the bottom.  Your hands will smell like yogurt when you’re done cleaning it up.  For weeks. And if you leave it on the ground in your garage? The mouse will get to it and leave a hole big enough for the dark, sticky fluid to leak out. A mixture of balsamic vinaigrette and orange juice. Plus yogurt. Your garbage says a lot about you, but your inability to take out the garbage regularly says even more.  Like you have some kind of personality dysfunction. But I’m no psychologist.  I’m just a friend, letting you know that your garbage stanks. So take it out!

 

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